Writing Contest - Sentences I Never Thought I Would Say Or Hear: Volume Eight

In Which I Say and Hear All Kinds of Bizarre Things, You Use Those Things As Writing Prompts, and The Winner Takes Glory, Bragging Rights, and a Free Year Of The Starfire Codes on Substack....

Aug 01, 2024

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

PAST SENTENCES CONTESTS

SENTENCES, VOLUME EIGHT - THE RULES:

Use one or more of these collected sentences in a story, a script, a piece of original music, or a poem that you write.
No editing the prompts. They must remain intact.
Post a link to the story, poem, music, or script you have written in the comments of this article so I can find them and so that others may enjoy reading these too.
This link you provide will serve as your “entry.”
The link must be listed in the comments of this article below in order to qualify as an entry.
I will read all of these and choose a winner. I am a human being. I promise nothing but my own subjectivity as a judge. It’s the best I’ve got, so it will have to do.
You may comment as much as you like, but only enter one piece for consideration. I only have one me, so unless one of you can clone me, you are only allowed to enter once.
The winner gets glory, bragging rights, and a free year of SFC on Substack.
You have until August 31, 2024, to submit your entry in the comments below.
After that, I will create another post in which I will link all of the entries and announce the winners.

And without further ado, here’s the prompt list for Volume Eight….

Sentences I Never Thought I Would Say

I think my work here is done. Let’s all take a boat out to the Mu “No Fly Zone” and see what’s there.
If it’s a bunch of arsonist donkeys, I’ll buy first round.
How are you at alligator piñata?
It's only been five minutes and they keep biting me. I forgot to wear my citronella ghillie suit.
I should probably have a say in my mortality prevention care.
I think if you’re going to turn my brain into some kind of weird hermit crab, we can do better than a fax machine.
It’s the peak of peek-pique. And now I want a jammy dodger.
We must become the undecylenic acid to the biofilm of the fridge-mind.
That sounds painful. Have you tried NOT pulling clown handkerchiefs of coagulated petroleum products out of your person?!?!
I’m sick of these lies!! Field trip to MU!!

Sentences I Never Thought I Would Hear

I'm still alive. Pretty good by that evidence. I think the trick is to swing for the snorting sound.
I've solved the free energy problem. We just need to exhume Orwell's grave, wrap his corpse in copper, and hook electrodes to each end. The problem practically solves itself.
I can't unsee that. My disappointment is endless and my day is now ruined.
Thank you for being a lunatic who regularly says the most FUBAR, trip-tarded things imaginable.
If you find any suspicious items that look like hand grenades, you must report them to the police immediately. Do not touch them or use them as a hammer, as the consequences could be catastrophic!
We have to keep Starfire alive at all costs.
It might involve squeezing all the glitter out of unicorns or something.
Alligator piñata sounds like something best played with a high caliber rifle!
On behalf of all of us here at Donkeys, Inc., congratulations on the extraordinary milestone!
And that's how you survive a plane crash... even without a centaur.
Now, I must go to time square in a chicken suit, wearing a kilt and wave huge billboards while laying eggs. I need a volunteer to wear an Ewok suit and be my assistant with the sound system.
The weather people keep predicting lovely rainstorms—my favorite! But they keep pushing it back. It’ll be pouring when you wake up. Oh, no rain then, but definitely by 10. 11. 12…. I feel like I’m 15 years old and getting blue-balled by some random girl at a party.
Of all the word salad you could have had, that one was a Waldorf. It was well-constructed and had a point.
Microplastics? My energy system says thanks! It eats microplastics for breakfast and spits out really stretchy, super healing vibes with echos of dinosaurs in them.
He ain't gay, it's just his hustle.
People are more nuanced than broccoli and bears.
Gerry Rafferty - Baker Street is flying saxophone above the yacht…man.